Hangin’ Tough with the Right Stuff

Leave it to New Kids on the Block to bring me out of my blogging funk.  I’ve been thinking of lots of things to update on here but never bothered to get around to it.  Let that be a lesson to you…never underestimate the power of the boy band.

My brother presented me with this little gem today:

He found it in a Goodwill, knew I would love it and bought it.  If this sounds familiar, you might remember he bought me one of their other videos a few years ago.

I absolutely love every single thing about this cover.  First of all, how much more street thug cool can you be than to have your picture taken literally in the street…next to a minimally graffitied wall…next to a sign that reads drug free school zone? Not much let me tell you.

Looking at Joey, aka Little Joey Joe, *sigh and swoon* (it was quite the competition between Joey and Jordan as to who would be my favorite New Kid but in the end Joey won out) I have to wonder if he was expecting there to be a flood or whether he hit puberty in the time between buying those jeans and taking this picture.  My guess is the latter.

I don’t really know what look Danny was going for…Tom Cruise in Risky Business?  More mature? Cool and casual?  Let’s go out for an evening stroll through the back streets of New England while I impress you with the intricacies of freshman community college knowledge. Fail, fail, and fail.  You’re not fooling anyone Danny.  We’ve all seen Community and the only intricacies of knowledge going on there is what to do should you find yourselves locked inside the school during a zombie attack.  Which by the way, was very helpful.  As a side note, I’m very excited for Community to come back this fall.  And very ticked with networks at putting it in the Friday, aka kiss of death, time slot and only greenlighting 13 episodes.  You suck networks *shakes fist*!

Nice pajama pants Jordan.  And what’s with that hat?  And the vest?

Jon, I’m totally loving your tights? long john underwear? under your jeans.  And penny loafers? Seriously.  I guess the jokes on us because you had us totally fooled.  How could we not have known you were gay? It’s so obvious in retrospect.  George Michael you were wrong, the clothes DO make the man.

Donnie, oh Donnie.  I just don’t know what to say about your mess of an outfit.  What. The. Crap?!??

So I turned the video over and this is what graces the back:

How about a closer look?

Looking at this I can’t believe Jon’s the only one who’s gay.

Joey, or excuse me Joseph as it’s labeled, must really like that T-shirt he’s wearing of forgot to bring a change of clothes to the photo shoot.  I’m loving the bowling pin broach on his jacket.  Did you know I like to bowl Joey?  Did you, did you??  Oh the fun we could have had.

Seriously Jordan,What. Is. Up. With. That. Hat??  You look like a creeper with your fingers trying to give a dainty tip of your hat.  You might be about to give a cordial greeting but you’re undressing me with your eyes.  Perv.

Jon your hair is perfectly coiffed and looking closely I think your eyebrows were purposefully brushed that way.  Again I ask, how did we not know you were gay?

Donnie I still don’t know what to say.  Your clothes and style are sending all sorts of mixed messages.  Mostly ones that say you look stupid.

Danny, I forgot you had that nasty rat tail.  I wish it could have stayed that way.

Oh man, I can’t wait to push play!

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Today I Was Schooled

I’d really like to think I’m smarter than a four year old but when it comes to technology I just might be slipping behind.  About a week or so ago I bought a new phone.  After years of the very basic of the basic of all phones, I bought *drum roll please* ….an EVO

And I have no idea how to use it.  I’m still figuring out all it can do though in all honesty I never really will learn it all.

Today I was at work and I was talking with one of the four year olds and he pulled out my phone and asked if it had any games on it.  As a matter of fact, I have one.  Angry Birds.  A game I had never heard of until a week ago and have only played two or three times.  Most recently was last night when I tried for almost a half hour to complete level 10.

I turn the game on and start to tell the four year old how to make the bird fly out of the slingshot.  He interrupts me and says, “You have to push on your phone with your finger.”  To which I replied with, “No, you move your finger like this and let go.”

No sooner had I done that when he jabs his little finger on my phone and wouldn’t you know that one bird turned into three birds and killed all the pigs and advanced me to the next level.  Seriously?!?  Thirty minutes I spent on that stupid level and a four year old completes it with the push of a finger.

It’s crazy to think about all the things kids know about and know how to do these days.  And just like I’ve never lived in the world when man hadn’t been on the moon, these kids have never lived when there weren’t cell phones or ipods (among other things). It reminds me of the song What a Wonderful World when Louis Armstrong sings, “I hear babies cry,I watch them grow.  They’ll learn much more, than I’ll ever know.” I can’t even imagine what kind of advances in technology these kids are going to see in their lifetime.  It’s just crazy.

 

Here’s Your Sign…

While I was home I came across a few funny signs/ads. Because I’m still blog/computer deficient I can’t figure out how to get the pics scanned smaller and on the actual blog page so I had to post them on flickr. Still waiting for a couple pics from my brother as well but here goes anyway.

The first one is actually my favorite. The building used to be a KFC but is now empty. I can only assume that some delinquents had a good time one night when they posted the message on the marquee. At least I hope it was some delinquents because otherwise…well I just don’t want to know. The sign reads: Close Visit O Gonads.

The second sign is front of a daycare apparently owned by a women named Carrie. Hence the name Ms Carrie’s Day Care. I’m not sure that’s a good name for an establishment dealing with children.

The third sign (that I’m waiting for a picture of) was found in a little, sleepy town in southern Arkansas. It belongs to an automotive parts store. However, someone should have raised a flag when they discussed naming the business. The sign reads: Clarks STD Parts. Hmm, no thanks I’ll pass.

Hornets and Wasps and Bees oh my!

I worked doing landscape for a few years at a university in my home town.  There are so many stories I could tell from that job but I’m going to start with the bleacher assignment I got once.  Before the outdoor sport season starts (baseball, football, etc.) someone has to check under the bleachers for different types of creatures that decide to make their home there.  This was my job one day.  So I set out with a mirror duct taped to a broom stick (modern technology I know) so I could scan underneath the seats.  I was specifically looking for black widows, wasps, hornets, yellow jackets, and bees.  I started on the home side.  I walked up and down, back and forth.  There was the occasional web with no spider and a bee or two.  No biggie.  I made it over to the visitor’s side.  Same thing, up and down, back and forth.  You wouldn’t think it would take that long to check the bleachers especially since this was a smaller unversity hence a smaller stadium but this had so far taken up a large portion of my day.  I don’t know if it was the heat, I was in Arkansas in the middle of the summer, or shear boredom (probably both) but I wasn’t really paying attention anymore.  That’s why before I knew it I had almost walked right into a large yellow jacket nest.  And I’m talking huge.  This thing was at least 6 or 7 inches tall and wide.  I believe there was an intake of breath followed by a swear word.  Holy crap it was big.  My very first thought was “they’re crazy if they think I’m going to get rid of this.”  But then I thought of my supervisor and a few guys on the crew who were actually terrified of bees and their relatives.  I’m not terrified, I just don’t like them.  And I was the only girl on the crew and was always aware that the guys watched to see if I would get special treatment because so.  I could only imagine what they would think if I went back in the office and said I wasn’t going to get rid of the nest and someone else had to do it for me.  There was no other option.  I had to suck it up and do it myself. 

I think I still stood there a good 10 min at least after I came to that decision.  So I got ready.  I had a plan.  That plan was to spray for as long as I dared and run like the dickens down the bleachers.  I braced myself.  I might have even said a prayer.  And I sprayed.  Then this monsterous cloud of yellow and black emerged, and for the briefest of moments I hesitated like a deer in headlights.  And then I ran.  Oh how I ran!  I ran all the way down to the bottom and started across longways halfway across the bleachers.  I stood their panting half from adrenaline and half b/c I was so out of shape.  Again I waited for about 10 min before making my way back up.  I was convinced that they would be able to smell fear like dogs.  Or at the very least they would be able to smell the can of Raid and know I was the killer behind the ambush and I was back for more.

All was not as quiet on the home front as before.  Many were circling around the nest or maybe they were mourning the loss of their comrades as there were quite a few that had fallen in the attack.  As I was standing there trying to build my courage back up, two co-workers pulled up in their truck…to watch!!  Apparently, I hadn’t realized I was as high as I was and they had seen the whole thing from wherever they had been on campus and came for front row seats.  I asked for help but they couldn’t hear me over their pointing and laughing.  And it was apparent I couldn’t just wait it out until they left because they actually turned off the truck and sat back to watch.  Thanks a lot guys.

So I mentally went over my plan again…spray and run! Spray and run!  So I began spraying and to my surprise they were quicker at leaving the nest and actually starting coming towards me.  I don’t know if that’s normal behavior but it’s what really happened.  I think I let out a little yelp and turned to run.  This time I didn’t run quite as far (only a few bleachers down) but there were a few eager yellow jackets that had still been following.  This caused another yelp from me and continued running.  Much to the delight of the guys in the truck.  Jerks. 

But this time going back up was better because I had killed the majority of them and the rest seemed to have flown away.  There were a few stragglers but no real threat.  It took  a while to pry the nest out but when all was said and done I had conquered the beasts and could say I killed hundreds with a single can.