Alice Cooper Lied

School’s out for summer
School’s out forever
School’s been blown to pieces

No more pencils
No more books
No more teacher’s dirty looks

-Alice Cooper

August 30th will be my first day back to school in almost 10 years.  Ten years people – an entire decade!  Since I’ve only had three of them it’s like saying “a third of my life ago, I was in school.”  Egads.

I’ve said on here before that if you’re ever in a natural disaster or experiencing a legitimate crisis, you want me there.  I’m cool, calm, and collected in these situations.  But tell me when I’m in line at McDonald’s the shake machine is broken and I have a melt down.

Likewise, my reaction to important decisions that will a affect my life vs. those that in reality are inconsequential are seemingly backward.  For example, every so often I get the notion to change my hairstyle (trust me, this definitely constitutes as an important decision that affects my life.  Ladies, you know what I’m talking about.)  Not a little trim or slight highlights but full on, whack off a foot or more, I can no longer pull my hair back in a ponytail because it’s so short haircut.  And from the time this notion first occurs, to the time I act on it,  is almost always within 24 hours.  No thinking, no waiting, no second guessing.  Ask me which restaurant I want to eat at for dinner and you’ll be eating a pre-dinner to tide you over until I come up with a place.  You know come to think of it, maybe I just have issues with food.  Hmmm.

I’ve been hanging out in Arkansas without a plan and not knowing what it was that I was wanting to do about it.  Well, I knew what I wanted to – nothing.  But that wasn’t exactly conducive to my predicament so one day I thought, “Fine.  I’ll go to grad school.”  The next day I went over to the local university and walked in the door and said, “I have a BSW, I guess I want to teach elementary, what program do you have that will get me doing that the fastest and cheapest way.”  Ok, so that wasn’t exactly what I said but more or less.

And that was the start of the last couple of month’s whirlwind of grad school run-around that I’ve been playing.  No real thought went into the decision.  No research examining different programs and no arming myself with information before going into battle.  Just walked in and began to acquire information on what I guess the university sees as a need to know basis.  Which is a tad ironic since I need to know everything now and not one person seems to have ALL the information needed.  But that’s a whole other frustrating post.  But regardless, I registered for fall in a program I knew nothing about a couple weeks prior.

I discovered that as part of my admissions I must take the GRE.  Technically, according to the program, I have until the end of my first semester to submit test scores.  In the meantime, I’m considered a conditional student.  Personally I didn’t care what my status as a student was until I  learned I cannot qualify for financial aid as a conditional student.  No financial aid means no school and no school means I’ve been wasting my time the past couple of months with all this application crap.  Again, a whole other frustrating post.

Bottom line – take the GRE sooner rather than later and begin the paperwork for financial aid.  The hype for the GRE makes it out to be one of the hardest tests you can take and in many circumstances it determines whether you will be admitted into the grad school of your choice.  People shell out a lot of money in prep materials and to take special classes for months to get themselves ready.  And the test itself is $160.

Me?  I signed up for it last week and took it today.  No studying.  No special classes.  No prep materials.  I got online and spent about 20 min on a practice run and called it good.  And you know what?  The test wasn’t that bad.  I’m not saying I’m a genius or anything, well actually I would like to go on record saying I’m a genius.  Of course the GRE test grading computer strongly disagrees with my genius declaration and instead, deems me as average – more or less.  A little less when it comes to math but that’s not any shocking revelation.

But as a whole, the test questions didn’t seem crazy hard and if I had studied or had been enrolled in school for the past decade, I probably could have done a little better.  But I didn’t and haven’t been so I’m happy with the result.  And I guess it doesn’t hurt that the university I’ll be attending views the GRE as a formality to complete and virtually has no interest or concern in my score.  No pressure there.

So there you have it.  My more recent life altering decisions brought about from practically zero thought or foresight.  I really thought Alice Cooper had something but I guess I’ll have to wait another 2-3 years before this song has any validity for me again.

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7 thoughts on “Alice Cooper Lied

  1. I completely understand. When I was finally able to go back to school I had been out of high school for seven years. Yikes! And at this point, I probably have another 7 years left to finish! I think by the time I graduate I won’t know what to do with myself without classes to worry about. I tell myself every summer that I won’t take classes during the following summer, but by the time it rolls around, I find myself sitting in a classroom instead of outside enjoying the sunny weather! Good luck with school! I truly hope you enjoy it!

    Yuck, I’d hate to go to school in the summer. Though I may do just that this next year. We’ll see.

  2. I actually pondered a career change and going to Ed school a few years back, and having to re-take the GRE was one of the things that sidetracked me. (The biggest being that I couldn’t do it without taking six months to student teach, without pay, and that just wasn’t feasible.)

    Turns out my old GRE scores from my first round of grad school would be good – if I could find them. Apparently the testing service only keeps them five years. And I knocked the CRAP out of that bad boy back then. Now, it’s not so much that I’m worried I’d do poorly; I’d probably do better. But it’s just a dang PITA and I preferred to pout and say “I don’t wanna.”

    Good luck with schooling; hope it’s a blast for ya!

    I hope school turns out to be alright but you never know. After the first semester I may decide I hate the program. I’d really rather prefer they give me a classroom and some kids and let me do what I want without having to go to school but since that’s not going to happen, class it is.

  3. GRE test grading computer deemed me as ‘slightly retarded’ when it came to the math section. CONGRATS!!!

    I figured I didn’t care how I did especially on the math. I’m not trying to teach quantum physics at Harvard, I want to be a kindergarten teacher. As far as math is concerned at that level, I really should just know what numbers are. And the fact that I know it’s called ‘math’ puts me way ahead of the game.

  4. Congrats! I’m hoping to go back next year and I actually can’t wait. I’m a big school nerd and have always enjoyed it. I could be in class forever and be happy. Now if I could just figure out a way to pay for it…

    Thanks! I like school, sitting in class, reading the material, listening to discussions, I just don’t like the tests or being graded on anything. Paying for it is exactly where I am in my dilemma. I’ve got to get some financial aid or my time in grad school will be extremely sort lived.

  5. loved the actually I’d like to go on the record and say I’m a genius part…haha. And Pam ditto haha to your comment as well. Especially when you made the typo. We’re all so much alike; I love it. Ha!

    Would you expect anything less from me? haha

  6. I say kiddos for you, girl! I would love to teach also, but just like you, I have problems when it comes to paying for it…college that is. So, for the small, I-can-come-up-with-that fee of 50 dollars for a background check and some pee in a cup, I can become a substitute teacher. They are in dire need around here and I was told by all that I would stay busy to the point that it would seem like a full time job.

    I was going to do that this fall before I thought about going back to school but got the job at the preschool instead. My sister did it and I know she worked a lot so it’s well worth looking into.

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