Bumpits, Alien Babies, and Some News

I’m not a big fan of watching the news.  The stories are rarely positive and uplifting and I figure I can scan the news blips on the internet faster than sitting and listening to them drone on.  But a few weeks ago I was flipping through the channels and noticed something I hadn’t before.  When did news anchors become the official unofficial models for the bumpit?  I became mesmerized by this lady’s large growth coming out of her head.  And it wasn’t just that network.  All the stations had at least one anchor that could use her hair as an extra locker to keep her purse.

Speaking of, remember Debbie Harry’s character in the original Hairspray movie?  She kept a bomb in hers.  And Ricki Lake was busted out of jail in time to dance a new dance she called the bug while wearing a pink dress with roaches all over it?  I have to buy that movie!

Anyway, between news anchors and the women of Utah and Idaho, bumpits are well on their way to world domination.  She looked an awful lot like this girl:

And the more I stared, the more I started making other connections:

I have no idea what it means yet but I’m sure I’m on the verge of cracking some great conspiracy.

Ever notice how alien faces look like newborn baby faces?  I’m talking straight out of the womb, still covered in goo baby faces.  This is an underlying concern I have, should I ever have kids of my own.  I don’t know if I’ll want to look at it right away.  I may have to wear Ellen Degeneres blindfolds while I’m giving birth just to cover my bases.

Maybe this is the real reason women are required to stay in the hospital so long after delivery, to give the kid a chance to morph into a more human looking form so parents won’t be freaked to take them home.  I’m just saying.

I tried in vain to find a picture of the local news anchor that inspired this entry but I couldn’t.  It didn’t help that I couldn’t remember her name or which station she works for but those are just minor details.  So instead I found something else that I’ll leave you with.  I thought this was so hysterical I watched this clip over and over for at least twenty minutes.  Enjoy.

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6 thoughts on “Bumpits, Alien Babies, and Some News

  1. I think those bumpits are ridiculous looking, and who really needs their hair to be that huge right there? They sell them here, and I’ll never buy one! Love the post!!

    They are ridiculous but apparently profitable.

  2. That video is the best! How hilarious. As far as bumpits…yeah Julia begs for them every time she sees the commercial. ha ha Lame. The alien baby thing…you may be on to something but of course MINE never looked like that! LOL!

    I don’t know why but that doesn’t surprise me about Julia. You should buy her one just to appease her LOL. I’m sure most parents that read this will think the same way but ALL kids look like aliens. haha

  3. The bumpits make me laugh! Every time I see the commercial I think, “Who would wear those goofy things?” Apparently your news lady is one of those people. It reminds me of the eighties… when we women tried to make our hair as big and poofy as it possibly could be.

    The babies looking like aliens is so true. Honey, I don’t think I looked at any of mine right when they were born. You know, maybe that’s why my kids act the way they do sometimes…they’re really from another plant!

    Yeah I don’t get the whole big hair thing. Maybe as a costume or something but not for everyday wear. Yep, I knew it…kids are aliens.

  4. I love that news anchor’s freaked out little dance.

    If I ever get married and have a kid I don’t even want to be in the delivery room when the whole thing goes down. Clean him up, wrap him up and then present him to me after the gross part is over. I’ll be in the waiting room, nervously pacing back and forth. I’m old fashioned in some ways.

    His dance is funny and accompanied by his gargle noise it’s just down right hysterical. I don’t understand people that want tons of family and friends in the delivery room and I really don’t understand the people that go in.

  5. Those bumpits are stupid! They’re so obvious and look so ridiculous – I can’t believe there are people out there who actually think they look good wearing them. Yuck.

    What kills me are people who put in more than one at a time. That I just don’t get.

  6. i wear a bumpit and it looks good..my friend lakyn juss teases her hair and you cant tell which one of us has the bumpit in..so i guess it just depends on your hair i dont know,, but i like bumpits

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