I Think I’ll Do That Instead

About a month or so ago we had a lab meeting with the boss of the boss, so I knew it was going to be good.  Because work has been so slow for the past year, the powers that be have decided to close down the lab – hence we will all be out of a job.  The departure isn’t expected to happen before the new year so at least there is plenty of warning (unless they come in tomorrow and pull the plug but that’s doubtful).  Compared to a few co-workers I have it pretty good.  I have no family to support and no commitments that tie me down to Utah or anything else for that matter.  Needless to say I’m not worried and don’t plan on even thinking of making future decisions until I get back from my trip to Arkansas at the end of the month.  And probably not even then either.

But then again, this has caused me to think of my dream jobs and how sweet life would be if I could manage to get one of these.  In no way am I qualified for any of them really but that’s why they’re called DREAM jobs.

And in no particular order:

1.  Food Taste Tester

This could turn out very badly.  Like if I was required to eat some delicacy from some island no one had ever heard of.  This would probably end up being something with more than 4 legs and still alive.  Maybe the title should really be Food Taste Tester with an emphasizes on dessert (as long as the dessert doesn’t turn out to be flan or tapioca pudding *shudder*)

2.  Hotel Tester

Imagine getting paid to go on vacations to check out hotel services.  I would make sure they knew I could travel abroad.

3.  Photographer for National Geographic

You get to travel and see the most beautiful and interesting places in the world.  Um, yes please.

4.  Photographer for Favorite Band

Let’s see, you get to travel and hang with your favorite band all the time.  You get exclusive interviews and free reign to take pics and not only would they let you, but unlike the paparazzi, they would be paying you to do so.

5.  Book Reviewer

I read lots of books anyway so I might as well get paid to do so.  And the review wouldn’t be hard to do because it’s just your opinion of what you read.  Simple as that.

6.  Movie Critic

This is the same idea as the book reviewer.  How are people “qualified” to do this anyway?  Just watch a movie and say what you thought of it.  See… thumbs up, thumbs down.

7.  Toy Tester

Imagine going into a room full of toys and being told you will get paid to play with them.  I think I would feel like Tom Hanks in Big.

8.  Mattress Tester

Now hold on just a minute.  I already know where some of you may be going with this one but I’m referring to SLEEPING on the mattress – that or jumping from mattress to mattress in the store.  “Ma’am we’ll pay you and all you have to do is take a little nap.”  Where do I sign?

9.  Bookstore

I would prefer to work in an old, local, used bookstore as opposed to a large chain but either could be fun.  You would have full access to all sorts of different kinds of books and if your store wasn’t busy you would have plenty of time to read.

10.  Hiker

I heard a guy yesterday say that he was a professional hiker.  I’m not sure what that entails exactly but I think it’s kind of strenuous.  My job wouldn’t be.  I would go walking on trails and get paid for it.  Let’s see, get to be outside, lots of exercise, and not be bothered with phone calls and deadlines.

Who knows?  Maybe in 6 months I’ll be writing an entry from a hotel on some remote island, dining on bugs, while taking pictures for National Geographic as I go for a walk on a backwoods trail.

12 thoughts on “I Think I’ll Do That Instead

  1. I can picture you as a toy tester. That makes me smile.

    Hrm…new camera? New career? I see great things in the works!

    I would love to be a toy tester! Especially with toys that you throw or shoot. I might never leave the NERF section.

  2. Roger Ebert is looking for a new reviewing partner… you could be the one!

    P.S. Justing thinking about tasting flan gives me the gag reflex. I just couldn’t do it. I cried a time or two when I was in Mexico and had to eat what they gave me. Actual tears, I tell you. Maybe a CHOCOLATE taster (but mole would never ever be included).

    Actually both him and Roeper are leaving the movie review show b/c they don’t like the new direction it’s going – whatever that’s supposed to mean. I could eat the flan but it would never get a positive review. There are lots of different types of mole and while I’m not a fan of Mexican mole(especially poured over my meat), I had some in Guatemala and it tasted and had the consistency of pudding.

  3. That reminded me of the time I threw a Popple at a girl in school and gave her a bloody nose. Who know they were so dangerous? When I was 26 I didn’t have much sense.

    J/K! I was 8.

    I had no idea a Popple could give someone a bloody nose. Maybe she was just a pansy – or you had a great arm. At 26 I think I would be more concerned with why you still had an accessible Popple than the act of throwing it at a girl. Good thing you were only 8.

  4. I actually saw them selling Popples again at Toys R Us, I think that’s where I saw them. I believe I squeeled with delight. My husband may have run out of the store in shame.

    Anyway, personally I think a small local bookstore would be way better than a large chain. It always feels more personal when I go into my local used bookstore, but at the same time I’m sure you would get a way better discount at B&N or Borders.

    You probably would get a better discount at a large chain but I agree, the small store is much more personal. I’ve noticed toy stores are regurgitating all the old 80s toys like they’re a new item. I prefer the originals.

  5. Ben and Jerry’s employs testers to make sure that the ice cream is evenly tasteful. Sign me up.

    Holy yum!! I would love to taste ice cream all the time. My body might not like it but my tastebuds would.

  6. Oooo…food taste tester…sign me up! I’ll eat anything. The only downside would be the pounds that would, no doubt, be packed on with that job.

    What? No flan or tapioca? Sheesh. Guess I won’t invite you over for my famous rice pudding.

    This is true. Maybe if I become a food taste tester I should also get a job hiking. That way my body balances out. The texture of flan and tapioca kind of make me gag but I’ve eaten a lot of concoctions of arroz con leche and I like it. So I’m sure I would be just fine for your famous rice pudding. Matter of fact, I’m hungry right now…

  7. I want one of those jobs on the Travel channel where they get to go around to cool places, stay in fun hotels, and talk about how great it is to visit there. Pretty much ANY job where I could go around the world and have it be a giant tax write off would be the job for me.

    Oh yes, the Travel Channel! I should add that to the list. “Well, this week we’re heading to Italy and Greece to experience the culture, food, and visit the sites…” Take Me! Take Me!!

  8. Those are all awesome dream jobs. I’ve always wanted to work at a bookstore too. I wouldn’t even mind doing a chain one if I got a large discount. One of my friends actually had the Hotel testing job, and she gave it up! I couldn’t believe it. I would die for that job. 😀

    She gave up the Hotel testing job??? That’s crazy!

  9. I have a friend who worked for a medical research company…she went into various chatrooms pretending to have STD’s and such so that she could do market research on the target audience. I always thought that sounded kind of interesting, though I never could have pulled it off.

    Good luck with your impending change….so many possibilities!

    Oh my gosh that’s awesome! I don’t think I could do either actually. I would probably start laughing or would have no clue how to answer questions they may ask me. But I’d be willing to give it a shot for a little extra dough.

  10. I’m sure things will work out.

    Re: #4: New camera? New Career? New Kids On The Block On Tour? Hmmm……..

    HAHA!! NKTOB tour – I love it! Well, the timing did align itself so perfectly. I’m going to submit my resume.

  11. On Hotel Testing: I may be a guy, but I have total job envy of Samantha Brown from the Travel Channel. We both grew up here on the seacoast of NH, hung around the same social circles and now, she is travelling the world, hanging out in exotic hotels, being pampered, seeing amazing sights and immersing herself in cultures of foreign destinations and I’m……NOT! GRRRRRR.
    Is it wrong that I have an almost irrational amount of jealousy for this woman?
    By the way, been meaning to comment on your blog for awhile…holy niceness! And I totally have camera envy now… *must control urge to go shopping now*

    Glad you stopped by! I don’t think it’s wrong that you have irrational jealousy for Samantha Brown. If it progresses to the creepy stalker stage there might be a problem, but for now it’s all good. Her job sounds awesome and I’m not sure why some people get to do cool things like that while others (me) stare at a computer screen all day doing something non-productive. *sigh* The camera is awesome even though I’ve only had it a day. I definitely recommend it!

  12. Mmmmmm…. mattress tester. That would be a top choice. Get paid to take naps, and, you would probably get a free bed for the house. It’s a win/win!!

    Good call on the free bed. I’m sending out a resume/request to all bed stores as we speak…

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