A few weeks ago I wrote about how I am the poster child for what Oprah dubs as a Shlumpadinka. This wasn’t always the case. Where did I go wrong? So I set out to prove that at one point in my life I was fashionable and put together. I sorted through hundreds of photos to have documented proof of this mystical time in my life only to find these horrific images instead:
Ok so this picture isn’t horrific. In fact I think I look pretty dang cute. But there are a few things to point out: 1) My hair is pulled back with yarn. Creative but kind of funny and 2) Check out my shirt. The year is 1984 and it’s pretty obvious with the whole sweatshirt cut off look. Though you can’t read the entire thing, my shirt says THRILLER. And I know this wasn’t a hand me down because it’s child sized and Thriller only came out 2 years before this picture.
So, yeah, um…that’s hideous! To be honest, I really don’t ever remember actually wearing this sweater. And if I did I blocked it out…and rightly so!
Unfortunately I do remember wearing this…and liking it. What was it about the 90’s that designers couldn’t stick to one color or design per article of clothing? Why did they have to mix everything together??
This one is my favorite of gross clothing pics. I’ll start at the top and work my way down. First of all, it’s hard to notice I had three holes in my left ear…and I put giant different colored hoops in each one! I later added another hole to that ear but never put a hoop in it and for the record I now only have one hole in each ear with small studs in. I’m wearing about 20 different extremely cheap necklaces and at least 8 rings that all turned my fingers green. What in the world – did I think I was a gypsy?? The tie tied shirt is just ugly and way too big. It wasn’t even my shirt. I thought it was so cool that I begged my friend to let me borrow it. And of course biking shorts. What you can’t see, because the shirt is so big, is that I’m also wearing blue jean cut offs. And they weren’t just basic cut offs – oh no. I took scissors and cut slashes through the entire thing. Sick and wrong. Just sick and wrong.
While I might not be a fashionista, I at least know I’ve improved from this…..I hope!