Shameful Manipulation or Secret Super Power?

The other day I wrote about a shopping experience at Target where I had to deal with an employee I deemed as incompetent, at least for that moment.  As part of my comments, morethananelectrician listed 3 things women can do to get what they want from a man.  They are:

Look…I am not sure how to explain this without seeming sexist in some way…so I apologize in advance for offending anyone.

You: “Will…I would really appreciate it if you could see if there are any more balance balls in the back for me.”

There are three options here other than the straight delivery of the line. Each has its’ own advantages…

1. Look him dead in the eyes and smile. (If he is younger than you he will run to the back)

2. Touch his shoulder during the delivery of the line (This should work on any man)

3. Cry. (This works for men older than you).

It may be wrong, but if all you are trying to do is a get a ball from the warehouse area…don’t go to a woman, especially if she is thinner than you are.

This is good advice.  I’ve always been somewhat fascinated that women can get most any guy to do most anything.  And yes, this does work in reverse but generally I think men give into women more than women give into men.  A couple of years ago I conducted my own little experiment to test this out.  I began telling a male co-worker that he owed me candy (which of course was ridiculous).  Everyday I would ask him if he remembered to bring it to work for me.  And of course this was always accompanied with a smile and the usual flirty whatevers (within reason of course, I was at work afterall). 

At first I think he was baffled and really wondered if he did owe me something because of a previous bet that he had forgotten.  And when he would ask why he owed me candy I would just smile, look him dead in the eyes, and say something lame like “just because”.  I was persistant, and sure enough, one day I walked out to my car to find a basket overflowing with all sorts of candy inside.  I have to say I was a little surprised because I wasn’t sure it would actually work but, there it was.  Was it sneaky and underhanded?  Sure, but then again I was the one enjoying a large assortment of candy. 

My conclusion is this, if a guy is going to be gullible or willing to be manipulated then why shouldn’t I use all my resources to get what I want occasionally? (And I do stress occasionally because done too much it makes you appear to be a tramp)  To get someone to do something simply by smiling and giving them “that look” really is a super power.

Gotten out of a speeding ticket?  Not had to pay for something?  Reduced work load?  I’m curious to know what you’ve done to get someone to do something or what’s been done to you.

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9 thoughts on “Shameful Manipulation or Secret Super Power?

  1. Going back to morethananelectricia’s advice for the Target incident, so much depends on the male’s appearance and personality. I could not make myself do a manipulative shoulder touch if the recipient creeps me out in any way, shape or fashion. If however, the person has an ounce of attractiveness, I might be able to smile a little more than I would be naturally inclined for the sake of obtaining a much desired exercise ball.

    I’ve been pulled over twice for traffic violations, but only received warnings both times (no, I did not cry). I don’t think that I knowingly flirt in these instances, but my husband is adament that I do. Sometimes I think the flirting happens unconsciously.

  2. I agree with Allison: if they guy in question is just plain frightening, flirty behavior could lead to a brand new stalker.

    I don’t manipulate men very often but when I am desperate, I’ll employ certain behaviors which I know will get results. I went white water rafting with friends several years ago. There were 4 women and 1 guy in our raft. I disliked the guy from the beginning as he was afraid of water and couldn’t swim (NO CLUE as to why he came with us). We took a break and ate lunch. I suppose he got bored and popped the raft with his ore. Again, no clue why. With half a deflated raft and 6 more miles of river to go, we were screwed. Other rafters wouldn’t help us. Desperate times, right? There were some kayakers and I waved them over, fiddled with my top and then bent over. No tears, no touching, and no eye contact because he was talking to my boobs. Got the help we needed in just a few minutes and made it home safely. Never spoke to the loser who popped our raft again.

  3. Yeah, I never touch the guy on the shoulder, knee, or anywhere else. I don’t care how hot I think he is. That’s a line I just won’t cross. I’m convinced that whatever it is I need can be accomplished by a smile, look, or tears – no touching.

  4. You know, I’ve been thinking about the touching thing some more. Why is it that guys feel the need to touch? Personally, I’m a no contact person. I get squimish when I have to give hugs to family members so I realize that I’m overly sensitive. However, guys generally do one of two things. They either elbow you which to me comes across more like a shove than a playful nudge or they poke on the side of your stomach. Unless you’re a size negative, this might be one of the worst places to touch a girl. Talk about becoming ultra self-concious. My worst was when a guy I was with on our FIRST date smacked me across the butt. Um, hello. Needless to say that was also our last date.

  5. Tears are my kryptonite.

    I really do not like to be manipulated, but enjoy watching other try to do it to me. I am in the business of trading favors for a living but disquised as a construction manager. The ladies try to get me to have my people do all sorts of things for them and have my office pay for it. Doesn’t work that way.

    Many times, I just send one of my guys over there, knowing that he is a sucker for a woman and a smile and they end up doing it for nothing. They know before they get there that they are going to have to work out their own deal because I have no room in my budget for this.

    Construction workers are the worst…they spend the day around people that look like “Mel” from Alice and are powerless around anyone who smells better than old cheese.

  6. I must have skipped over the “meat” of Pammy Girl’s comments.

    #2 was a difficult one because body parts, even when covered by tight garments, can be substituted for an actual touch.

    Boobs/cleavage should be used as only a last resort. That is very dangerous line in the sand, but I would think that stranded on a river without a raft would qualify.

  7. I have cried to get out of a speeding ticket (it was my 3rd, I couldn’t lose my license), and it just started. It was pure frustration at myself for getting caught speeding again. I have also used the clevage, mostly because the thought of touching someone, especially a stranger, makes my skin crawl. I know it’s shameful, and I’m a little embarrassed by my behavior but it has always worked for me.

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