1.  I was reading a quote by Ashlee Simpson the other day where she says the only thing she does to maintain her figure is to chase her kid around and that her arms are defined because she’s constantly holding him.  *blank stares and crickets chirping*  Are you serious right now?  First of all, you’re arms aren’t that defined for crying out loud.  But besides that, there is no way you’re as thin as you are because you chase your kid all day.  That’s ridiculous.  It’s annoying when celebrities say crap like this.  I help out at a daycare twice a week for a few hours and trust me, I haven’t lost an ounce being out there keeping up with 16 kids.  True it’s just for a few hours a week but16 trumps your one, trust me.  I’m just saying.

2.  Unless you’re a hot, single guy my age or someone at least 10 or 15 years older than me, please don’t call me sweetie, honey, sugar, or anything related to that.  I went to buy jeans over the weekend and the sales girls kept saying things like, “Do you have everything you need sweetie?”  “Hon can I get you anything else?”  Now I do realize I’m in the south and that’s part of vocabulary here, but it’s weird coming from someone younger.

3.  Why did the movie 2012 come out this year?  Wouldn’t it be more effective to come out in 2012?  I don’t have any sarcastic, snarky comments about this.  I’m genuinely curious.

4. Ever notice on cop shows people are constantly walking away from the police when they’re being questioned?  Usually they say something like, “If you’ll excuse me I have work to do” and then they leave.  Does this really happen?  I would think that if I was being questioned by police for something I would stay put until they tell me they’re through.  But maybe that’s just me.

5.  Kids. Hear. Everything.  And then they repeat it.  Helping out at this daycare and working with the kids at church, I’m constantly amazed and the things they’re saying.  Not because they’re repeating things that are bad, but because it’s usually the most random stuff that you know their parents never thought they heard.  It’s kind of funny sometimes.  Mostly because they aren’t my kids.

6.  Tyra Banks was on Jay Leno tonight and it reminded me once again just how funny Joel McHale can be on The Soup.  The show is basically him making fun of moments on reality TV (Tyra and The View being two of his favorites to pick on).  But honestly, Tyra just asks for it. I’d be surprised if some part of tonight’s segment isn’t made fun of by Joel. I couldn’t believe he was actually invited on The View as a legitimate guest a little while back.  The first questioned asked was why he makes fun of their show on his.  His response, “Have you seen your show?”  haha  I love it.

*sigh*  I need some new hobbies.

About an hour ago I was sitting in front of the TV when my brother came home from running errands.  He told me he had been in The Salvation Army and got me something:

Yeah, that’s right.  A New Kids on the Block, Hangin’ Tough Live tour performance on VHS.  It doesn’t get any better than this (ok, it does but this is pretty close).  I love my brother.

In a couple of hours it’ll be my mother’s birthday!  I tell her I’m what keeps her so young, but she just rolls her eyes and says yeah right.  I’m glad I’m able to talk with her about most anything and that she’s even willing to indulge me in doing things I want to do, even if she thinks they’re lame.

Just the other night I convinced her to watch The Lost Boys with me and though she kept repeating that the movie was dumb and she didn’t like it (how anyone could not like that movie is beyond me) she did laugh a few times and stayed to watched the whole thing.  Now if I could just get her to stay awake during Wayne’s World…

I love that on occasion she’ll say the word suck in conversation and the other day she used the word freak’n in a sentence.  Never in my life have I ever heard her say that and if you knew my mom you would know just how funny that is.  I love it and it makes me smile.

There’s so much she does for me, and mom, I want you to know that I appreciate all of it.  I love you!!

* I just had her read this and her reaction was “Oh brother” when she saw the entry was about her, “Yeah right” when she read the part about Wayne’s World, and “You forgot a comma.” (laughing the whole time of course)   haha  I love it.

That’s how long I went without my car.  But last night I finally got to go pick it up from the repair shop.  *sigh* It’s nice to have it back.

Even though I stayed home and handed out candy, I didn’t think that was enough of a reason to pass on dressing up.  So at the last minute I put threw this on

I think the kids liked it.  Well, except the one little girl that burst into tears and wouldn’t come up on the porch…whoops.

Another thing I love about fall, all the colors!

I woke up with hiccups this morning.  I hate hiccuping.  I don’t think they serve an actual purpose, just a way of my body sending me some sort of warning.  I don’t know what it’s warning me against exactly but the idea of being the next Charles Osborne has my attention.  They disappeared pretty soon after I got on the treadmill which is another thing I’m not fond of right now.  I wish I could be one of those people that love working out and do it willingly and obsessively.  But I don’t and I’m not.  Don’t get me wrong, I love when I start seeing results and I even like how I feel right after a workout but it’s getting started everyday that I dread.

Whoa, as I’m typing this I have the TV on and The Wendy Williams Show just started.  Is she really a guy?

Seriously, is she?  I’ve never heard of her but she has a RuPaul vibe going on.

Last Wednesday night we had an etiquette dinner for the 8-11 yr. old girls I’m a leader over.  It was pretty nice and the girls all seemed to have a good time.  At one point one of the other adults that was there helping out was telling the girls that while they’re really young now, it’s good for them to go ahead and learn proper etiquette.  That way when “you turn 16 and go on a date you’ll know which utensils to use and how to conduct yourselves properly.”  Are you kidding me?  I’m 30 and have never been taken out on a date to a place so fancy I needed to know which utensil to use.  Matter of fact, I’ve found it more helpful to know which value number I want.

In addition to working with these girls on Wednesday nights, I’ve helped a little with all the kids on Sundays.  Each week at least one of those kids says something that makes you crack up.  One week the teacher was asking the kids what makes Sunday a special day.  She was wanting typical church answers like you get to be with family or you learn about Jesus.  One kid in total sincere honesty yelled out that football was what made Sunday a special day.

And this past week one of the teachers told the kids that something really bad had happened this week.  Why she ever said that I don’t know.  Her news wasn’t really bad and even if it was, you don’t need to tell the kids and especially not by prefacing it like that.  But anyway, as soon as she said it some kid (maybe the football kid) said, “Did someone get shot?”  Good grief.  While it was kind of funny because it seemed to come out of nowhere and he was genuinely thinking he had guessed correctly, there is a little girl whose dad did in fact get shot and killed a couple of months ago.  She was thankfully not there on Sunday and the teacher quickly moved on and just told them the news.  Maybe she’ll think twice before prefacing news like that again.

I think that’s enough boring randomness for one post.  Besides, my allergy (I’ve never had allergies before.  One more sucky thing to add to the list) medication is kicking in and I’m finding it hard to focus through my foggy, medicated haze.

Last night I went back in time.  Back before my time.  Back 50 years, to a time when folk music was all the rage.  The local university invited The Limelighters

The Brothers Four

and The Kingston Trio.

Turned out my brother and I were the youngest people in the audience by about 35 years, no real surprise there I guess.  The Brothers Four were the first to take the stage and I couldn’t believe how well they harmonized.  I mean, I know that’s their thing but it was truely impressive.  They actually turned out to be my favorite of the night.  Not a lot of talking but rather had their songs flow one into another, yet they were still personable and engaging.

The Limelighters were probably the zaniest of the groups.  I kind of think their lead singer (if there is such a person in a folk group) looks like he plays in a ska band.  Well, a ska band made up of older people.  The Kingston Trio were the headliners and the only group I had heard of.  Matter of fact, I really like The Kingston Trio and knew almost every song they performed.

None of the performers of any of the bands were the original members, but they were all so insanely talented and sounded incredible that I imagine it was similar to hearing the originals 50 years ago.  It was a fun night and I’m really glad I was able to go.

I’ve never been much of a fall person because it always meant winter was around the corner.  And with winter comes snow and ice, shoes instead of flip flops, and all whole smorgasbord of stuff I don’t like but equals misery for me.  With a sense of winter dread looming around, I’ve always bypassed the cool things I equate with fall that I really do enjoy.  This year I’ve decided to post those things in what I’m calling For the Love of Fall (this may end up being my only post) and to kick it off…drum roll please…Caramel Apples!!

Today, for my first time, I made caramel apples.

Turns out they’re a little trickier than I thought they would be and the first couple have WAY too much caramel on them.  Oops.  But it got a little better and while they may not be the prettiest every made, I’ll bet they taste just good as any other.  Let the love of fall commence!

First off, they found my brother’s car.  Which would be a good thing except that it now looks like this:

Not exactly the way it looked when my brother left it at the car repair shop.  News on my car was more upbeat however.  The insurance paid me more than it will cost to fix it so I have some extra cash in my pocket – very nice since I still don’t have a job.  Very nice indeed.

A couple of weeks ago I was asked to be one of the leaders for the girls ages 8-11 in the church I go to.  They have activities twice a month and my first one was this past Wednesday.  And you know, it wasn’t that bad.  I don’t know what I was expecting exactly but it was fun and the girls paid attention.  I created a game of Bingo that fit in with the lesson and brought a bag of prizes and a bag of candy…so that’s really why they all paid attention.

Thursday I got sick.  I haven’t had so much as a sniffle in almost three years so I guess I was due.  It knocked me out and I’m only just now getting my bearing.  Fingers crossed I’m good for another three years.

Last but not not least, I spent a few hours lastnight editing pictures I took when I was in Utah this past weekend.  Fall is in full force there and our first day was gorgeous.  Here are some of my favorites:

Click here to take a look at all of them.